Saturday, June 12, 2010

sometimes when i (01-24-10)

dip it once
dip it twice
dip it again and again


fill one hole
fill two holes
fill all the holes


                                       smoothing a thick coat of wax on each half
the candlemaker tempting the machine full of long
holes single piston serving stripped of its covering
used for cooling some of this heat may be transferred
from the air to the body


turtle
on top of
turtle
on top of
turtle
on top of
turtle
on top of
turtle

7 comments:

NIKKI said...

i am usually my own worst critic...but this is one piece of writing that i actually love:)

Old 333 said...

That really is a trip, Nikki. Turtle on.

I always get a kick out of the 'Onan' brand of generators. One-cylindered, and very reliable.

Thanks for a really funky, like musical-feeling funky poem.

P

Megan Duffy said...

I like the jumping sound of the last stanza. It reads fast in my mind which is fascinating and pleasingly contrary to the subject.

I am really liking you poems.

PO Johnson said...

Really eye catching, grabbing content.
("My generation" is on the radio now, don’t know why I mention this though, it’s certainly not about my generation and I don’t even like the song. I wish I could be an artist like you I have so many strange ideas I would like to visualize but I have to write. I envy you).

NIKKI said...

nikki ~ take it easy on yourself:)

old ~ i think of the chili peppers - yertle the turtle when i read this...freaky styley

megan ~ thanks, that's exactly how i read the last stanza too!

po ~ thanks for the envy (just kidding) i would like to hear these "strange ideas" of yours:)

Thomas Sheridan said...

One of the best poems yet posted to this group and I mean no disrespect to the others as the standard is so incredibly high here.

NIKKI said...

thomas ~ wow! what an incredible compliment, you made my day:)